Oh To Be In Bandra

‘The Bandra Mac‘

Just like the Americans use ‘man’ in their slang, we use ‘men’

Just like the Americans use ‘like’ we use ‘no’ giving you masterpieces

like…….’Ow you men, Larry?’

SITUATION: Meeting Larry on Saturday morning in the bazaar….. ‘She was giving me dis, dis small pomflits (while showing the size of her palm) for bledy 50 rupees, men !’

SITUATION: Family rosary at the D’Souza’s ‘Ail Mary, full of grace, the Lord is with thee, blessed are thou …….Norma, just see whether the back door is latched….. amongst women and blessed is the fruit of thy womb,Jesus……….It’s closed?…..ok….Holy Mary..

Another amusing, but true fact in Bandra is the One and

Only ‘secret’ BOTTLE MASALA !

The Goans have their ‘Xacuti’ and the East Indians have   their ‘Bottle Masala’…why?  Because it is stored in old beer bottles…that’s why!  And there’s so many ingredients in it that no one can even think up a name for it. It’s just simple logic!

Every family claims their family recipe is the best and that there is more colour in theirs or that there are 5 or 6 more cloves in theirs than the next door neighbours.  Everyone knows how to make it and what goes in it, but the family secrets stay within that family and no one can get it out, unless married into that family or in extreme cases when there is no heir, on the deathbed.

The first rule of ‘Bottle Masala’ is, you don’t talk about Bottle Masala.

The 2nd rule of ‘Bottle Masala’ is, you don’t talk about Bottle Masala just use it quietly…

The 3rd rule of ‘Bottle Masala’ is, you don’t ask questions about ‘Bottle Masala’

– Contributed by Bunty and  Brenda D’cruz

National Treasure

Azo hopes to be to National College what Andora’s is to St. Andrews College. That is the one stop food joint for hungry teenagers on a minimal budget. And Azo has even been quite ambitious with the items on their menu. While most joints catering to college kids would include burgers, puffs and soft drinks, Azo has gone a step beyond. The vegetarian menu is predominantly Italian, at least with the names. They serve lasagna, pastas, rolls, sandwiches, a wide selection of creamy milkshakes and a dessert of the day. And they have every college going teens diet staple … fries and fresh lime soda. The menu is strictly vegetarian and we started off with the Lasagna (Rs.65) and Alfredo pasta (Rs.55) which were hardly authentic but cheesy and nice nonetheless. This was followed by a plate of French fries (Rs.20) which was happily decorated with crisps; a refreshing ice tea (Rs.30), a creamy pineapple milkshake (Rs.60), a paneer Manchurian roll (Rs.55), it was non-rubbery so it scores high; and at last a paper thin crusted margarita pizza (Rs.50). Phew! The food is strictly alright, but at these prices we were hardly expecting Mia Cucina cuisine to roll out. The menu also boasts of sandwiches (Rs.25- 50), vegetarian rolls and even salad. They have coleslaw, Russian and surprisingly even Kim chi! The décor is fun and it is inevitable that many college hook-ups, fight, friendships will be formed within these crimson walls. So, if you’re strapped for cash head to Azo for a quick bite. The place is packed during the day but the crowd dwindles towards the evening. Where: Mangal Kunj, National College Lane, Linking Road. Open till 11pm

– Glynda Alves

Biryani @ Blue

Another treat for all you foodies out there. Out of the Blue has revamped their look and brought in a lot more colour to the place. To celebrate this new look they are having a special Biryani festival for all its customers. Just to show you how special their biryani is they are making it from Devat Gold rice and serving it in copper pot. You can choose from a Muddas Al Murgh(chicken), Bombay Tawa Gosht(Lamb), to Nawabi Tarkari(veg) with raita, pickle and papad complimentary. An added bonus is that Bombay Blue now serve liquor. So, while your eating the mouth watering biryani you can quench your thirst on a cold beer or even a cocktail. Try the Murgh Biryani and the Methi Vedi Aur Paneer Ki Tahiri, their  just simply delicious. Where: Bombay Blue, Junction of 14th & 33rd Road, Off Linking Road, When: till October 5th, Contact: 26000444.

– Rommel Albuquerque

Eat All You Want

Starters are normally just the small portioned very tantalizing snacks before the main course.  But what would you say if I told you that you could have unlimited starters? sounds too good to be true right. Well believe it! Noodle Bar in celebration of its new improved deécor is treating all their customers to an all you can eat starter festival. For Rs.330 plus taxes you get to eat an unlimited spread of more than 25 steamed, fried, tossed and baked oriental starters and dips, with a glass of Tiger beer or Iced Tea. There’s something there for everyone with some chicken Sui Mai and the finest Momos to the cheese wantons and the 34 varieties of oriental rolls. Try the Honey Chilli Wings and the Mushroom and Leek Sui Mai. Where: Noodle Bar, Ground Floor, Junction of 14th & 33rd Road, Off Linking Road, When: Till 30th Sept, Contact:  26044555

– Rommel Albuquerque

A Beer Bonanza

Pause is having a beer festival and everyone is invited. This is no ordinary beer festival, there are no beer games but (you’re gonna love this part) the beer is unlmited! It kind of makes you think , this guy just said I can have as many beers as I want, but how many can you really have? Well that’s up to you or till you pass out. Pause has even designed a special menu for this festival. They have 6 veg and non-veg items like stuffed mushroom with Parmesan, Oriental chicken sausages, Moroccan spiced sausages etc. Okay, now that we’ve told you the best part, here’s the downside. The unlimited beer is Tiger beer and you can avail of this offer Mon-Thurs 12pm to 1pm and Fri-Sun 12pm to 6pm, and you can drink as many beers as you want but only for 3 hrs. Where: Pause, Hill road, Opp Globus, Cost: Rs500 plus taxes for 3hrs, When: till October 11th, Contact: 9987520011.

– Rommel Albuquerque

Get Ready To Hog

Hoggers of Bandra unite this October as Biona hosts its annual sporting event- the Hogathon contest. So, save up your hunger for the free for all eating contest. Biona will challenge contestants to gorge on a never-ending array of cakes, pastries, doughnuts, Danish rolls, sandwiches and croissants. And if that doesn’t tempt you enough the winner gets free food visits for some time to come. The only down side is that they don’t throw in a free gym membership. So, get ready for what is meant to be a fun, fulfilling and very satisfying day. Don’t forget to wear your pants with the elasticated band! Where: Before the Police Station at Hill Road, When: 5th October (Register now), Contact: 022 26411921 / 09833848301.

– Glynda Alves

Bag-nificent

Setting up shop on Hill Road is tricky business. Lack of visibility and the dirt cheap prices the road side stalls would tempt any shopper away from the “real shops.” But Mag seems to be managing just fine. The new shop only stocks bags and shoes but that’s part of the charm and also part of the shrewd business tactic of the owner. Clothes are a dime a dozen on Hill Road but a proper bag shop like this is a rarity. Big, small, bright and blinged out, Mag has it all. We love their vast collection of yellow, purple, leopard, red and peacock blue bags, and they are at really reasonable prices (Rs.300 onwards). They also have a limited but worthy collection of pumps, slippers and heels (Rs.300 onwards). If you’re not looking for a branded bag, but a fashionable one and want to be spoiled for choice, this is the place. Where: Hill Road, adjacent to Bata Shoes.

– Glynda Alves

Provoking Paintings

Suchitrra arts is finally back with an art exhibition. With all the regular works of art being displayed in other galleries, Suchitrra has something different in store for us. The theme for this exhibition is Red, Black and White. Though is might sound like a normal theme one would have at an art gallery, the works that have turned up have been surprisingly interesting. The artists have have even dabbled in displaying their interpretation of current issue like Ghanshyam Gupta’s work on Terror with a cycle that has a pressure cooker strapped on surrounded by a spiral of colours. Buwa Shete’s depiction of a child and a mothers love for each other are simply moving. But Satyajeet Shinde’s depiction of a man having a cup tea steals the show. Where: Suchitrra arts gallery, 2nd Floor, Hill View 2, opp. Mehboob Studio, When: till 14th October,11am to 7pm, Contact: 26426479.

– Rommel Albuquerque

The Unusual Suspects

You’ve sat at Bandstand, you’ve chilled at Carter Road and you’ve even done your time at the semi-shady Reclamation promenade. These are the well known and popular Bandra hang outs. But then there are the places where if you are over 18 you will have never heard of… the unusual Bandra hangouts. They may be unconventional but they are more often than not packed to the brim. Read on to find out where Bandra’s most unusual hangouts are.

1. CAFE COFFEE DAY WALL: On first glance the dozen or more teenagers that sit on the wall right outside the café may seem like customers waiting for a table. But, if you pass by an hour later and still see them sitting there you will know that that is their only purpose for the evening. Teenagers hang around the wall because it is the prime location to see and be seen. But, if you do fancy a day on the wall, head there by 4pm.

2. GHANA WALLA PAVEMENT: Either the ghanna walla has a magnetic personality or there’s just something about the pavement. Hordes of kids gather around this pavement for gossip, sugar cane and chota Gold Flake. The hangout used to be complete with the vada pau guy a stones throw away, but the BMC dealt with that. Packed during college hours, the crowd usually dwindles as evening and curfews approach.

3. YMCA LANE: A place of choice for the upper crust of Carter Road visitors. And by upper crust we mean those who want to see but not necessarily be seen. Full of fancy cars packed with youngsters, the lane offers a bit of privacy but you can still feel the vibe of the road. The parking spots closest to the main road are the most in demand.

4. UNDER THE BRIDGE: The tunnel leading the Reclamation promenade is plastered wall to wall with young coochie cooing couples, from Bandra and beyond. The place is dark (some over-zealous couple might have busted the lights) and quiet. But, beware… it is tremendously suspicious.

So, if your bored of the same old places every day check out these unusual places where you can hangout.

– Glynda Alves

Seniors Day Out

The Royal Vintage Carriage

You always hear of kids or families and friends going for a day out just to relax, get away from the noisy city and just have a little fun. But now it’s time for the senior Citizens to enjoy a day out. This Saturday, a fun day out is being organized by Josie Mascarenhas for all senior citizens. Senior citizens can expect a picnic like trip filled with games like housie and many others especially designed for them. Along with games, there’s even going to be sing-along sessions where senior citizens will get the chance to croone to some classics.

The day is aimed to introduce a well designed old-age home in Panvel called ‘Nishkalanka Seva Home which when translated means pure home.  Josie Mascarenhas tells us more, “It all started with people asking me if I knew a good old age home for their father or mother and I used to tell them about this place in Panvel just off the highway. But people would say, ‘Oh Panvel is so far away!’ , but it is actually just an hours journey by car. This place is very nice and has wide open spaces and is in a little township.” The home is spacious and can accomadate around 200 people and they even have their own health center.

Apart from all the games and singing, senior citizens are in for a another treat as the famous ‘Royal Vintage Carriage’ bus will be taking them to their destination and back. The day will start at 7.30am and end by 6pm with breakfast, lunch and tea being included.

When: Saturday, 27th September, Entry: Rs250, Contact: Josie on 9820340455.